Let’s face it: resolutions are great in theory, but in practice? They are a whole different kettle of fish. It’s even worse as a parent, too. What’s that phrase, “the road to hell is paved with good intentions.” All of those good intentions begin on New Year’s Eve.
I wrote a few weeks back about my intention to start meditating this year, as a promise to myself to fill my own reserve back up. I was honestly doing fairly well in the first two weeks, but I hit a wall, and who the heck knew that 10 minutes could be so hard to find in a day? Needless to say, I was inspired to write this out, because I know many of you are struggling with the same feelings of failure, after making big plans to change yourself a few weeks back. Do yourself a favour: let yourself off the hook, and have a laugh at my expense.
Stage 1: Between Christmas and New Year’s Eve
It’s starting to feel like I’ve been burning the candle at both ends, maybe indulging a little too much for the past month. I should definitely cut that stuff out on January 1. In the meantime, I’ll want to make the most of the holidays. Extra drinks and desserts for everyone!
Stage 2: New Year’s Eve
Why the hell is everyone talking about a “power word” on Facebook, instead of resolutions? Do I have to choose just one word? Maybe I can just say “better?” As in, “I’m going to be better at life, now that the holiday season is over.” I guess I could choose “less” and it could mean “less of me.” So if I’m choosing “less,” that means I need to be eating less junk food, and exercising more, and probably de-cluttering my house, too. That sounds like plenty. I’ll start tomorrow. Tonight, though, is all about more!
Stage3: New Year’s Day
OK, who actually starts their New Year’s resolutions when they have a hangover? Plus, we have that New Year’s dinner to go to, and it would be rude to say no to the desserts and wine. I’ll start tomorrow, and I’ll be fresh and ready to go.
Stage 4: The Week After New Year’s Day
I will do all the things! After purchasing a gym membership on January 2, I’ve had a fitness assessment with a personal trainer and worked out three times already. I can barely get in and out of my car, but I feel great, because I cut out alcohol, sugar, and dairy, plus I’ve switched to green tea, instead of three cups of coffee a day! I’m light as a feather, I can tell just by the way my clothes fit. It’s amazing what a few little changes can do for your life, isn’t it?
Stage 5: Two Weeks After New Year’s Day
I pulled my hamstring, so I haven’t been able to work out for four days now. Plus, I weighed myself and I’ve somehow managed to gain two pounds, despite cutting all that other crap out of my diet. Let’s not forget that I would kill anyone in front of me, if I could stay awake long enough, thanks to the lack of coffee.
Stage 6: End of January
I would do anything for a cup of coffee. Or a mocha. In fact, maybe I’ll get today’s exercise out of the way by walking to Starbucks. Who cares if it’s only three blocks away? They’re long blocks!
It’s possible this is a slight exaggeration of what has actually happened to me this January. All the same, if you can relate just a little bit, perhaps it’ll make you feel like less of a failure. Because trust me, you’re not.