There is no doubt that becoming a "mother" is a wonderful chapter in life. With this, a mom often allows less time for hobbies, interests and certain lifestyle elements that they were once used to. Yes, it's a sacrifice made happily to care for your bundle of joy that changed your world, but you still need time, time for YOU.
You may feel guilty to break away from the kids but it's okay for mommy to have time alone to recharge. The other thing that happens when you take time away from your kids is that you actually miss them! And that’s a good thing for you and for your kids. When you get the space you need and you find yourself longing for reconnection with your kids, the quality of your interactions when you reconnect will be much better = recharging for everyone.
Here are some tips on how mommy can spend her alone time:
1. Pamper yourself. For some, this may be a manicure, pedicure, massage or finally booking that hair appointment for "the works" (you know, cut, blowdry and maybe some colour/highlights). For others it may mean filling the bath tub with bubbles and having a nice glass of red wine….and for others, it may mean having coffee/tea at your favourite location (some have free Wifi connections so you can read, research or catch up on emails and correspond with friends). Who are we kidding, for others..it may simply mean going to Walmart to walk up and down the aisles uninterrupted (or get groceries and check off some items from the "to do" list).
2. Do something enriching. As mothers, we are mainly surrounded by babies/children which limit our exposures to the world beyond toddlers. Try visiting a museum, a gallery … or going to your local Book Store and pick up a book (or If you go to a Chapters, you can buy your favourite Starbucks drink, find a chair and have some uninterrupted time to yourself to read away). If you love books, start a Book Club with your friends!
3. Seek out other moms. One thing for sure is you are not alone. Find other moms to connect, support and enrich with and each other. momstown has moms night out events that as Program Pass members, you can benefit from. It's a great way to connect with other moms in your community…there are many amazing friendships that have developed because of these programs. (Visit your local momstown chapter to view calendar and list of events).
4. Rest. A mother's time may just mean closing the door to your room and having a nap to recharge…and that's okay.
5. Exercise. Take the time to go for a walk or jog. If you have a gym membership, it may be about going to work out for an hour or participate in your favourite class (e.g.. spinning, zumba, yoga).
So mommies, it’s okay to need time alone. It's okay to want time to spend as you choose. It’s okay to want to listen to nothing or listen to your choice of sounds. It’s okay to not want to be interrupted for a space of time or to choose what interruptions you will engage with. It's okay … the important part is to find the time to do it, even if it means half an hour.
Can you think of other ways you would love some alone time? Feel free to share.