When you’re young and perky and glowing, the idea of menopause equates to the end of your enjoyable adult life. It is far away, something that happens to older women who seem a bit crazy and have wiry grey hair that they’ve given up dying. And then, you have children or find the love of your life – or both, or neither – and the passage of time ceases to be observed. You forget that you’re supposed to be ageing because you feel the same inside as you did in your 20s. Well, except for the desire to go out at 11pm to start the party.
The year I turned 40 didn’t actually feel monumental, as it was happening. I had a few health issues that eventually got resolved, we moved out of the city and into the suburbs…and I started perimenopause. Only I didn’t realize it for nearly six months. Instead, I asked myself again and again, in each and every scenario, “Am I going nuts?” When I finally asked that question with my outside voice, my husband replied, “No. I’ve noticed you having hot flashes for the last six months.”
Why. Didn’t. You. Tell. Me. You. Bastard.
Having finally put all the pieces of the puzzle together to make one magnificent picture of a woman ageing far earlier than she expected, I now wish to present a fun game for all the women reading. It’s called, “Maybe she’s born with it? Maybe it’s perimenopause?”
Perimenopause is turning out to be quite the joyride of symptoms. I had no idea you could start as early as 40 and neither did many of my friends, but here we are, hitting middle age. There’s something about it that feels strangely reminiscent of puberty, except we’re smarter, we tolerate less BS, and we know our worth now. So bring on the change. I will embrace it as best I can while giving the process my best middle finger as well. Because hot flashes.