Forget pump n dump; just this once, take a moment to squirt and sip.
Like all good momstown recipes, this one is flexible and lets you tailor it to your tastes.
1. Open the vodka, gin, rum, whisky, or liquor of choice. If making a mocktail, use fruit juice.
2. Put the breastmilk in the freezer in a tightly sealed sterile bag. Label it with today's date now, before Step 3 interferes with your judgment.
3. Pour yourself a belt from Step 1.
4. Ahhhhhh. You earned that. Cheers, and have a happy April Fool's Day, from momstown.